Talk To Me

I got to talk to some of the kids on the phone the other week. I always miss them majorly when I talk to them.

Hugo was gorgeous, as he always is when he pulls out his I love you Missy.

Princess was decently chatty, all about her birthday, which, dude, I was there. And you didn't bring any cake in. And some other stuff too I think.

It was Molly who really blew me away.

Me: So, what have you been up to today?
Molly: We're going to get a snake today.
Me: Oh really. What kind of snake?
Molly, in my head: 'A big one' or 'A brown one' or something like that. Leading to my next question about size or colour or whatever she didn't already tell me.
Molly, for real: A Children's Python or a Carpet Python or possibly a SomethingElse Python.
Me: .....

And then she chatted away for ages in the most mature manner possible, asking where I am and telling me she's coming here next year and all. I totally forgot I was talking to a preschooler and told her to Call me when you get here, we'll go out!

Oh! And! Dude, if The Parents tell you to keep him awake, you cannot fricking put him to sleep. Seriously, read a book, do some puzzles. He will sit quietly enough.

The centre is definitely not the same without me and LMC and T - and now D? Damn.

Last Day (Again)

We had our rocking Preschool Holiday Program and PR2 / Likhwa's Last Day / T's Last Day / My Last Day Party Day on Friday. We made cookies, balloon people, glitter paintings, and party hats. We also ate huge amounts of cake provided by Likhwa, Emma, and Jack/Hugo/Syddy's shopping skills.

When I said goodbye to Mia (who is the best-spoken two-year-old in the whole entire world), her mum said that she's never seen Mia love someone as much and as quickly as she loves me. Which was the sweetest thing in the world for her to say. Even if I have a simple explanation for it. In the words of LMC:
I'd go back for one day just for the ego stroke.
When everyone in the whole center thinks I'm awesome, even kids who've never met me are bound to agree starting right then. It always wears off though!

I wrote goodbyes to J/H/S in their books, including a new update of what Hugo is into right at this present moment in time. Things like:

Likes:
riding his bike on the concrete
throwing things into the playroom from preschool
Hugo in the preschool room
cookies

Dislikes:
riding his bike on the bike path
the playroom
food that's not fishbites or cookies.

In addition, here's a list of things I've said in the last 24 hours or anticipate saying in the next that will confuse anyone in SA all to hell (and their origins):

Hugo: Oh no [insert something that has fallen, eg 'oh no stars' or, more likely, something that Hugo has dropped, eg 'oh no orange', or 'oh no tana toast' or, and this is not not within the bounds of possibility, something ceramic that Hugo has somehow taken the lid off and dropped it to the floor and smashed it into a million pieces such as 'oh no toilet'].

Connor: Behind you! (Even if said thing that he's pointing to is next to you or over there or even right in front of you.)

Connor: This one! (Said when he's choosing something, as in the following conversation:
K: Here Connor do you want your smoothie?
Connor: NO. (Another patented Connor phrase.)
K: Do you want my banana one then?
Connor: This one! (Pointing to my smoothie.)

Which leads me to...

K: Yeah no.

and...

D's pajama's from Pajama Party Day: Let me think about it. Ummm, no!

D and I: 1234...Hi5!

edited to add:
"i NEED you to ..." (hugo)
and
signing things like 'finished' and 'ready' and 'orange' at people who don't quite understand.

Bananas in Pajamas

Today was the Pajama Party. Everyone came in their pjs including me and D and T. I think ours was the only room where everyone did. Hugo had awesome glow in the dark skelton ones and Jack of course had Thomas ones. When I got there Hugo was all, "I have to go," and then, "I have to go to the Pajama Party." Obviously there were no balloons and cake, this was not a party. We did have pancakes but only the kids got them. Pfft.

Later,
Hugo: Read Teddy Bear books.
Me: Nah Hugo you read it.
Hugo: I need you to read Teddy Bear books.

How awesome is that?

First Day Back (Again)

"Hi Jake! I'm Missy! Get off the concrete!"
[Cue T and D pissing themselves laughing.]

Emma: My dad's on a work trip. It's cold. He has to wear lots and lots of clothes.
Jessie: Well, he can't wear no clothes.

Also had a heaps long chat with Anastasia who will never talk to ask you something but when her and Jessie and I had been messing around on the cushions for a while she wouldn't shut up. Jack is much more articulate now, and there's a new girl called Mia who is incredibly well-spoken for such a young kid. There's also a new kid called Tylar who I've decided will be a rugby player when he grows up, but a really sweet one. Syddy did her fake-coy thing for a while but of course got over it. Emma and Jessie hung off me all day which I'm hoping they'll be over by tomorrow. And we had signing class after work which was good as I'd forgotten some and got to learn some new ones. Let's hope the novelty of being back doesn't wear off for another few weeks!

Can't Stay Away

I'm heading home again; I'll be working at the centre for four weeks (back in my spot in PR2 of course!).

I honestly didn't think I'd being going back when I left last time. Now that I do, I'm truly sorry that Syd and I had such traumatic experiences of saying goodbye. It would have been much better if we could have said, "Don't worry Syddy, Missy's a wuss - she'll be back as soon as the temp drops below 15 degrees."

I feel bad, also, that I keep coming and going from their lives: I was there, then I left to go to uni. Then I came back for 3 months over Christmas, then I left. Now I'm going back, but only for four weeks before I'll be - you guessed it - leaving again. Although maybe it is a good lesson for them to learn that people may leave but if they miss you enough, they'll be back!

I'm thinking we'll get a big wall map and put photos of all the kids, and their grandparents who live interstate, and me of course, so they can see 'where' we're going when we go. Tjina's been around Australia, and Damon went to England, so a bit of geography in the room would be good theme for a little while, I think.

Driving me crazy right now: Imagine, by Alison Lester. SW had it when he was little and we loved it. I'm writing about it for an essay but I can't remember the words past the first bit.

Imagine if we were deep in the jungle
Where butterflies drift and jaguars prowl
Where parakeets squawk and wild monkeys howl.

Help me out, somebody.

Too Much Childcare

Tuesday Night:

I had a dream that involved me babysitting (or something?) Hugo but he was off at like holiday program down the track or something. And then I got worried and walked along the dirt road to where he was walking back with the group, except that he was really really dehyrated and fainting. So I picked him up and carried him back to where he'd been before, and got him checked out by someone but not an actual doctor. As we were waiting for the doctor we realised that he had a worm in his stomach (thanks House) and it came out through his bellybutton. So that was good, but then it crawled up and around his neck and attached itself to his tongue cos the woman who was supposed to be looking after him wasn't watching. But I got it off and we got him water and he was ok.

Wednesday:

I texted The Parents to make sure all three of the kids were ok, because I am a crazy girl who will stress out until she knows for sure. And they sent me cute pics of Hugo and Syddy.

Wednesday Night:

I was at a churchy-type building but I think we went in there looking for a restaurant. There was this mum being a bitch to her daughter and eventually the daughter burst into tears. Then she wrenched away from the mum and came running to me for a big hug.
(Then somehow me and my grandma were driving a car that looked like a trolley slash Laura's little jeepy thing slash bike and I had to figure out how to drive it.)

Soooo....

Is my subconsious saying I'm crap at the looking after kids thing? Or that I'm awesome?

Edited to add: That Wednesday Night one was totally a dream as well, in case you thought I really was about to crash a trolley/jeep/scooter thing while my grandma was in it.

Last Day

Note to self:
Do not wear your favourite (work) shirt to work on your last day. Also do not wear your favourite sports bra, especially if it is grey/white.
Love, Me.

I got slimed. And yes, although K had completely gone off at us for not putting detergent in the food colouring when we were doing shaving cream last week, she did not, in fact, put any in the slime. And so I am green. Less so than I was, but still green. And my hair feels like crap.

Hugo: Love you Missy.
Everyone: Awwww!
Parents: [still chatting.]
Hugo: BYE MISSY!
Ok kid, talk to your parents, they're the ones not taking you home.

And Little Miss Syd cried. Bawled her eyes out. And started off me and T, of course. She has been saying she's going with me for like a week. Clearly not pretend. Oops. She will get over it I know. Oh my god, I miss her already. I can't believe I am going to miss out on them all growing up. I will totally have to come back, and a real job can just go fuck itself for a while.

Bunna, Grace, Rachelle, and Zoe: ruling preschool in two years' time. Can't wait.

Book Club

Don't you miss book club? I loved book club when I was at school. It was so awesome going through and being like, "I'll have that and that and that. Money please mum."

Hugo gets book club from Nemarluk. No we weren't snooping through his bag, it fell out of his book ok? Anyway, we stole it.

Turns out, you really can say, "I'll have that and that and that." And then you just go, "Money please creche," and voila! a brand new Bear Hunt book. And life cycle collection. And space book. And I Spy. And Magic School Bus.

And yes, a Bear Hunt book just for me!

Jackaroo

Jack is a cheeky little shit. This is what I know.

He has however, been much improved this past week, even with me, which is the real shocker.

The cheeky is still there but the listening has increased a bajillion times. If you talk to him calmly and rationally (and end in "and then we can go and play") he's been doing as we (I) ask.

It's great, and I just thought he and I needed a big shout-out for this huge step forward.

(One problem is if I call in the cavalry (T) she always makes a big deal about how he wasn't listening to me, instead of just making him do whatever he should have been doing. It's singling me out to be not listened to and I don't like it.)

Tania vs Hugo

Scene: Lunchtime.

Cast: Thousands. (Ok, so it wasn't quite. It was 16 which is as much as we ever have, and about ten more than we ever want. But it felt like it because - )

Noise: Deafening.

Menu: Pumpkin soup.

Aaaand, cue T:


T: "ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP! THRE'S ONLY ENOUGH FOR ONE SPOON EACH, SO IF YOU DROP YOUR SPOON, THAT'S IT, YOU'RE DONE. UNDERSTAND SYDNEY?! DO NOT DROP YOUR SPOONS."

*Thunderous, stunned silence from all the kids*

Broken by..

Hugo flinging his cup. It bounces to the floor just at the end of T's majestic speech.

D and I piss ourselves laughing, while all the kids are incredibly confused.

Public Service Announcements

TO: The Parents Who Pick Up Their Children Anytime Between 11:30am And 2:00pm But Especially Between 12:00 and 12:30pm.

You may not know this (especially if you just or are just about to pick up your child from the nursery) but the kids have a sleep during this time. What you may also not know (being merely parents and not professional looker-afters of kids) is that we have to put the kids the sleep when sometimes they'd rather stay awake and play or maybe cry at the top of their lungs. And we like it when they stay in Sleepy Land once they're there.

Therefore, we'd appreciate if you Shut The Damn Gate Quietly. I'm sure you're not really in that much of a rush to take your bratty sleep-deprived kid home that you can't spare an extra second to NOT SLAM IT. Also, you want to have a conversation in the foyer? Sure, go ahead. At a whisper. Or you could go into the office. Or you could take your damn kid and go. Quietly.


TO: Staff Who Work Here Who Go On A Lunch Break (ie Everyone):

You know that the kids have sleep time. You most likely just spent half an hour trying to get one of your little brats darlings to sleep. (If you haven't you should have.) When you come back, you'll want a room of sleeping darlings instead of ones hyper on not enough sleep.

SHUT THE FREAKING GATE QUIETLY.

Mkaythanks.

I wanna be Syd

I want to be a four-year-old forever. Or Little Miss Syd.

You have to paint pictures or do collages all day. Then people say nice things about them, no matter what.

You have ride around bikes and be pushed on swings and go on bear hunts all day.

You get to sleep for two hours in the middle of every day.

You have your own personal hairdresser (which I would kill for and is the main point of my jealousy of Syd. I love people brushing my hair).

Seriously. How awesome would that be.

Incidentally, my dad is getting a prettiful calendar and Christmas card that I collaged for him all by myself at creche. He'll take it to work and be so very proud of his clever daughter.

Things I've Learned

7am is not merely a fictional device.

7am as a real time is muchly overrated.

If you begin work at 7am, the morning goes for-freaking-ever.

You do get a morning tea break though, which is nice.

A longer lunch break is over-rated. What the hell are you gonna do for the extra fifteen minutes? Nothing, that's what.

Being left alone in a playground (or a department store) is not as much fun when it seems like your parents have forgotten to pick you up.

If I swing real hard, I really can touch the shadecloth.

Cos T and I are so awesome

We're Going On A Bear Hunt!

Princess was all "I wanna go on a bear hunt." I think she just wanted some company on a walk while she pretended to look for bears but really got a personal walk with an adult, but I grabbed T and said "We're going on a bear hunt," and asked a few kids if they wanted to come and we soon had a big group following us on our hunt. Hugo came too, looking very confused at first, since he knows that the Bear Hunt book is "gooone, gooone" from the bookshelves in our room, but getting into it a bit more later.

As an aside, I know MJ doesn't like T and I hanging out together when we're outside, but since we ended up with more than half the kids tagging along with us, I think two teachers were justified and she can just bite me.

So we went

through the long wavy grass, swishy swashy
through the thick oozy mud, squelch squelch
through the deep cold river, splash splash
through the big dark forest, stumble trip
through the swirling whirling snowstorm, woooooh

until we got to the narrow gloomy cave

where we ended up at the corner of the fence where a tree is right in the corner

and they tiptoed tiptoed while I went and hid my
shiny wet nose
big furry ears
big googly eyes

until the BEAR chased them
back through everything
up the stairs
forgot to shut the door
back downstairs, shut the door, back upstairs
into bed, under the covers (ok back to the side of the shed, cowering in fear)

We're not going a bear hunt again!

Until next week cos the kids love us cos
T and I are so freaking awesome!

I'm back!

Went into work for a visit on Tuesday. They all loved me. It was very nice. Even Matthew and Rachelle who moved up from the nursery while I was gone wanted hugs, so that was a nice introduction for them and me.

Hugo is freaking amazing. "One blue plate." Oh my god. Still a cranky little shit when he hasn't had enough food or sleep. Jack is permanently a little shit. Syd is cute as hell and knows her cheeky grin forces adults to smile back, even when she's ignoring instructions.

M, the qualified in our room, annoys me, but not as much as Sh did so I guess it's ok. She does an awful lot of sitting and shouting instead of running and talking and playing and reading and laughing.

We don't have the bear hunt book or the dinosaur one in our room anymore. That's ok. I know them off by heart anyway. Hugo got all confused when I started reciting the bear hunt, telling me, "It's gooone, it's gooone." Hehe.

Three days next week.

Yuuummmmmm

It was my last day on Thursday.

I was going to bring in a cake, but Michelle said she'd make one so Goo could have it too. She promised it would be a gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free, yummy, chocolate cake.
Four out of five isn't too bad.

At least it wasn't mixed with ice-cream like the one I bought for the staff lunch. Yeah, oops.
Everyone was really nice. Got a card and a gift voucher, which I didn't expect, but helped fund yesterday's shopping trip.

I miss Syd. Thought of some great ideas for her hair last night. Will have to save them up til the end of the year.

There is a ccc pretty close. Don't know if I want to go there again. Besides, it wouldn't be same. So I guess that's the end of that. Although there is apparantly an org'n called Students4Kids or some suchness.

I guess you never know.

Staffing Stich Part 2

Turns out when I said 'two weeks' it should actually have been 'three months'. There is a big difference between the two.

As far as I can work out-
In the nursery: L and R do not want M there anymore as they feel she is incompetent. Although they don't mind her being thus in another room. J's position will be open soon and R will be applying.
In the middle room: P & K live together and therefore do not want to work together as well. If P goes, K will stay, but if P stays, then K will go to the nursery.
In our room: Sh is an idiot, but looks like staying. The nursery doesn't want her, I asked. T is applying for S's position which she just vacated. And I have applied to a school down south. Which leaves 0 of 3.

My first impressions of Sh were accurate.
1. She can't control the kids, most notably Princess, J&H, and Grace, all of whom like escaping during inside time and mealtimes.
2. She goes to the toilet like a lot.
3. She talks. All the time. And doesn't listen to the answers. So I tune her out. Then when she tells me the center's burning down, I won't be listening.

T and I made a list of things to 'discuss' at our team meeting. The meeting didn't happen but we passed the list on to Al. Don't know how much got through.

She has ideas, I'll give her that much. She just does not know how to do things in practice.

Enough Said

Faith: T, Liam said "butt".
T: Faith, just don't worry about it, everyone has one.
[then to me] Watch this.
[then to Emma] Hey Em, you have a big butt don't you?
Emma: Yes, I have a big butt.
T and I crack up laughing but Emma's not done yet.
Emma: I have sand.

LOL!!!

Staffing sitch

T was away on holidays last week. So it was S being T, me being me, and new-S being A, who is not coming back. Looks like nS will be A forever at the end of her two weeks' trial. Not sure I like this plan.
1. She backs down from Princess and call the cavalry in (me, which is such a joke) which I don't think is setting a very good precedent.
2. She goes to the bathroom, like, every half hour.
3. She asks all these questions, like, What should I do with this?
nS: Should we keep this paint?
S: Nah, it's not really worth keeping it over the weekend.
nS: We could if we had some plastic and put it in the fridge.
S: We don't have any plastic.
nS: I could just get some clingwrap.
S: We don't have any clingwrap.
Me: I don't know if it's worth keeping it. We could just make some more.
nS: I know! [returns with the paint covered in a plastic glove. She puts it in the fridge.]

Me and S: Or we could just do that.

I didn't check on my way home but I wouldn't be suprised to find the paint no longer in the fridge, maybe say, washed down the sink. S will be glad to get out of our room.

I Can Sign A Rainbow

My signing class starts this Monday.

T and everyone else has been going for four weeks so far, but I couldn't make it to the Wednesday class. They're all addicted to the signing thing now, even the people you wouldn't expect to be. The instructor must be pretty damn good.

T's been giving me updates every Thursday morning, so I'll be all prepared on Monday. Then we can start her revision every Tuesday after my classes. Hopefully this won't just be a fad.